Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
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