After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
