You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize