I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
Randomize
