she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
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