so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
