thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
