Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
