Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
