I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
