I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Dear god my vagina.
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