yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
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