The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
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