Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
