I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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