Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
Randomize
