Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I don't think brook has ever known best
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Randomize
