Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Randomize
