Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
Randomize