We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize
