he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
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