Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
Randomize
