I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize
