He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
