I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
