i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Welp...herpes.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
Randomize
