dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Randomize
