What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Congratulations! We have a period
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
