guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
