I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
