I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
