She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
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