Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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