I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize