Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
