Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
Randomize
