How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
