everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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