rhymes with "ouble enetration"
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize
