I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
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