Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Randomize
