you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
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