I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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