There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
It's blow job season.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize
