I love black thongs
So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
That reminds me...we need to get swords
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
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