I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Randomize
