The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Randomize
