its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Randomize
