There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
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