Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
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